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  • Writer's pictureTroyee Lahiri

The women in my life


March 8th was International Women’s Day and in today's post, I want to talk about the women in my life without naming them or glorifying their struggles over the years. Today, I want to look past that and talk about who they are as individuals.

One woman I grew up with is a lioness - living with unparallel dignity, educating other children like they are her own, providing for and nursing a paralyzed husband, surviving Breast Cancer herself. This lioness raised four cubs who are tough but kind – a combination that is so rare. She is the strongest I will ever know, and I look up to her the most in my family.


Woman #2 I grew up with has been a mother, a nurturer even before she gave birth. She loves and cares like no other. She remembers all the birthdays and anniversaries. She was the only woman in my family who married the love of her life, only to lose him to death a year after. She still talks about him like it hasn’t been 17 years but equally loves her present family more than anyone ever could.


Woman # 3 is the kindest. She is submissive but she will laugh the loudest if you say something funny. Her belief in God is a lot stronger than just rituals. She prays for everyone with all her heart, will always try to feed you till you’re full and her response to “How are you” is always “I’m good” despite Skin Cancer slowly decaying her body for the last decade. Her patience and resilience are beyond compare and she is the biggest fighter in the family.


Woman #4 is the life of a party - she will light up the room with her innocence and beauty. She is spiritual, kind, and wants to befriend everyone younger than her just to keep the youth in her alive. A child at heart, she still prays for her first, unrequited love’s wellbeing but continues to be a reliable partner in her marriage. She has the best collection of sarees and you will never be able to serve her enough whiskey on rare occasions of her drinking.


Hang in there. I have two more to go.


This woman is one of the most talented ones - a trained beautician, very good with crafts, stitching, cooking, you name it. She takes pride in being a mother to a son and socializes the most. You will always find her talking to people or sleeping because those are her two favorite activities. She cries a lot when she watches daily soaps and gives the best hair oil massage on earth.


The last woman I grew up with is also a social butterfly. Loves to cook and bake for others but enjoys eating the most. She expresses love by disciplining people around her (or at least tries to) and invests emotionally in all her personal relationships. She is the first woman in my family to break out of the norms and live life on her own terms by making her career the topmost priority. She is highly accomplished and hardworking in academics but very slow with double-meaning jokes.

 

In my mother tongue, Bangla, women are called “naari” ( নারী ). The word also has a homophone in my language ( নাড়ি ) that colloquially means “pulse” or “umbilical cord”. Even though only one of these women is my birth mother, I emotionally connect with most of them on certain levels. These incredible women I grew up with had the potential to achieve a lot more if they were provided with the opportunity and resources. But, given the circumstances and hardships, they keep nonchalantly playing their roles as mothers, wives, daughters, sisters, and most importantly, as strong women. I’m very proud and grateful to be a part of their stories and I look forward to the day I can share these tales with the next generation of women in this family.








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